It's been quite a while since I wrote my last entry.
I'm now on compliance leave from work, staying home, eating a lot =) Life is good!
I've been on my job for 6 months, survived one round of headcount reduction in mid Nov... Well, there might be another round in the next quarter but we don't know. Getting slightly better at my job, market is so soft now that has created more chances for me to explore new things. Lovin' it! Admittedly, there's always frustration at work when i couldn't find the best solutions. Fortunately i've a team who is able to brain storm with me, and to provide good feedbacks. Thank you team!
I moved in with Diana, finally.. It's a place that I can come home to every day after work, though not much interaction with the rest, I have my own peace. Thank you Imran for helping me move!
Time really flies... I still miss the times spent in HKG. Connecting myself with my best friends in hkg through emails every day. One day a girl friend said to me:" phoebe you are so secretive, u never told me anything, and here i am always sharing with you my boys stories" Haha... I found it so interesting! I thought about what she said. It's true the ones who know most about me apart from the usual suspect from AIESEC, are my girls in HKG. Oh well =)
I was just reading some old books at home, came across The Game. This is an interesting book, overall. I only like the front part, when the writer started going on and on about Mystery going crazy I quit. It's a book about guys learning how to pick up girls, the techniques they can engage, the online platforms they use to share experiences provide advices, continuously to refine their skills and eventually transform into a pickup artist. Some of the techniques can be applied in our daily lives too, you learn how to ice-break by having some stories ready, how to hold the audience attention and such. Pretty cool! Well the side effect of after becoming a great pick up artist, they start to lose faith in the opposite sex coz literally they can get into any girls' pants, regardless they're married,single, heterosexual, bisexual etc... Recently, I met some nice friendly older guys. They are doing great at their jobs, earning big bucks, fun to be with, they are living to the fullest of being a playboy while involved in longer term relationship. Haha... Well, if guys can play around like this, girls can too. It's purely a matter of choice. I found it become more challenging to believe in others' intention when being approached... But then i was telling myself there's no harm to have a drink with this person, especially when u're not sure, who knows what's gonna happen at the end of the drink? Just sit back, relax and have fun. It's okie to be less uptight.
Year 2009 is around the corner and I am getting one year closer to my death bed, I hope to become more patient, learn more, accomplish more, see more of this world. All the people around me stay healthy and happy!
Sunday, September 21, 2008
Finally I got my Singapore PR... Congrats!
This PR only brought me more pressure than before... The moment I read the letter, I realized the risk of coming back here is real... I am here for real... No more turning back... I shouldn't procrasinate any further, time to face the truth... Head Down, Butt Up... Either I kick ass, or I get my ass kicked.
Been on the job for 3months, in a way things are getting smoother but at the same time,I do drop the balls as well... Haiz... I dream about my job, on weekend I think about my job... Is it necessary? Perhaps this shows I am not competent yet at my work. Indeed I am not... And sometimes the way people do things, the reluctance to take up responsibility and be solution-focused, really really got me wonder... I understand we all try to protect our butt, but that's not the way. Anyways, I learnt!
On my way back from singapore, suddenly this thought struck me... Is it better to be loved than to love? Am I courageous enough to continue seeking the one who would capture my heart, in hope he'd love me in return? OR I should settle down for one of those that fell for me? As I continue to age with the accelerated depreciation rate, would I be able fight the curse of an old maid?
Tuesday, August 19, 2008
Saturday, August 16, 2008
~~ Count My Blessings ~~
I think I get lucky in my life, most of the times.. Except those relationship bs, I am blessed with lotsa love and help...
I've been given the opportunities to develop myself in different platforms, with steep learning curves... Being pushed and pushing myself... I don't think I've discovered my potential at this current role yet, so many things to learn.. Need to adapt, and be receptive to their ways of working and thinking... I realized how I would just shut myself down when I don't agree, refuse to listen.. Gosh, I am so not open minded... This is the worst attitude ever, when I refuse to understand/listen... It will only hinder me from progressing further... Someday somehow I'm just gonna pay a huge price for this kind of behavior *gulp*
Counting down 2 years and 46 weeks in this little red dot... Can you believe this? I don't know why I'm doing this... I don't know what's gonna happen... But I just wish to see more of this world before settling down... I realized I've been single for quite some times... And people have always asked me if I've imported any boy from hkg to sgp... Sadly, nope! Haha... It's been exciting to meet different people and just to hang out... My mentality has changed quite a bit, not looking for serious commitment, just friends that are looking for excitements in life too... Party till dawn, travel to the end of the world... Whatever comes along, I'm game for it!
Yes, I've been lucky.. But every thing comes at a price... Nobody would know how much effort u've put in, just to get this far... Life is not a bed of roses, definitely not my life... Aim High... Think Big... U're the Star!!
Saturday, August 2, 2008
I've been back for one month.... I feel like it's been a long time...
Every day goes by so quickly, before I realize it's already 10pm... Dashing off to get some rest before the sun rises again...
Admittedly, there's lotsa frustration that I am going through... From macro environment to daily routine... I know I am procrastinating... I know I should get myself together and move forward... I know I can do the job well, with more effort and attention... I have to say my manager has been supportive, the team is also friendly... Surprisingly, I am not used to a environment whereby mandarin is widely spoken... Most of the times, I have to resort to English to express myself in a clearer and more concise and professional manner... Lotsa challenges ahead of me, come what may!
My friends have been supportive... Dee took me in at the beginning, sorry for imposing on you, thank you for your help... Kenny grandpa has been spending times with me, always calm me down with his sincere advices... A couple of friends took time to hang out with me during their business trips to Singapore, introducing me to their friends... Started to build my social circle... Been going out, however the feeling is just not the same... Oppa has been the one who is able to understand my feeling perfectly, always shares his experience and perspective with me...
Been feeling emotional these days... Hmm, I guess this is part of the deal... There are people that I think of every single day... But for how long, I would think of them? Will they fade out eventually? I am scared of that day will come... Out of sight, out of mind?
It's another 2 year and 11 months in this land... What will happen within this period? Embrace my life... Loving every single second of it...